CHAAMA ATHIMBER…..CHAAMA JIJAJEE

CHAAMA ATHIMBER…..CHAAMA JIJAJEE

“Athimber ” in Tamil language, Jijajee in Hindi more or less mean the same….. “Brother in law”. However in Tamil language even aunt’s husband is called as ‘Athimber”, aunt meaning father’s elder or younger sister.

I am very fortunate to have met CHAAMA Athimber who was the husband of my eldest aunt, who took great care of my father in his childhood. Chaama Athimber had a very good physique. He was six foot tall and had broad shoulders. A small and silky tuff was adorning his otherwise near bald head. He was very proud of that, which we could learn from the way he used to fondle it whenever he had to pretend that he was thinking. It is totally another matter that he had little to think at any point of time!!

It was a closely guarded secret that Chaama Athimber had no avocation worth mentioning other than throwing his weight around the house in which had three sons and two daughters apart from our aunt! We used to visit them once in two years or so when we passed via Coimbatore! The house was always noisy as there used to be some noise or the other due to quarrel. There used to be many interesting permutations and combinations in the fights…Father with son, son with other son and father with aunt etc.

We always had a good rapport with the youngest son who used to take us to some movie or the other in the short stay we used to make in Coimbatore. With the youngest one it was fun. After good fun in the show, he used to take us to some nice restaurant for tiffin.  Once we enter the house after all these fun we used to have additional icing on the cake watching father and son fighting over marbles which our brother used to hide in the attic. Chaama Athimber would find that and start throwing them out in the dust bin!

It used to be interesting to attend any functions like wedding, betrothal etc. in the company of Chaama Athimber. Our Athimber always used to sport big shining tilak on his fore head. A nice shining jibba (loose fitting attire similar to present day shirt without collar) would be there. A nice dothi tied typically in otrthodox Brahmin style with matching angawasthram (type of long ornamental towel with nice borders!) would adorn the shoulders. So the moment our Athimber entered the hall people would turn their heads and give a reverential salute!

Whenever we enter the dining hall our Athimber would occupy a vantage seat. After a few minutes he would pick up a fight with the servers on some pretext or the other. He would summon the bride’s father or brother along with the head cook and make them to apologies for the delayed service or temperature of the food etc. That’s all needed next two days we would be received with the highest order of hospitality and served piping hot food. Athimber would swim in Degree coffee!!

Athimber was fond of playing cards in marriage halls with friends not otherwise. The sessions would last for hours together and everyone would be cracking jokes and enjoying his pranks.

Once we were travelling from his home town to Chennai in a car. The car had to stop in a railway crossing. Athimber felt like having a Panner Soda (Rose flavored aerated water). We went to a small kiosk. The shop keeper on seeing our Athimber got up and cleaned the bench. Offered him the ebest seat and served him soda in a very clean glass. He soon started talking to Athimber. Athimber was boasting about himself and we children were amused.

Then the shopkeeper asked Athimber what was his profession. Athimber without winking a second told    “Whole Sale business “. The shop keeper wanted to know in which commodity. Pat came the reply        “Diamond, Ruby, Emerald and such precious stones”! He then paid for the Soda. But the shopkeeper refused to accept the money out of respect for such a “Whole Sale” trader!

When I asked Athimber while returning to the car why he told a lie like that. Athimber told me how could he say that he was whiling away time gossiping in the village!! 

SUNDARI ATHHAI ( TAMIL) ….SUNDARI AUNTY (ENGLISH)….SUNDARI BHUA ( HINDI) !!!

One of the major time pass for us during our visits to Aunt’s house was to prepare her day sheets for two or three months at a stretch. The same used to be done with innovation as every date’s entry should to tally and match with Aunt’s travel bills. So after two days of rest on landing in aunt’s house we would be requested to sit and do the same religiously. The exercise those days was done with a little attention & care gave me an insight into learning and doing the art of mastering my travel plans and meticulously way of submitting the bills in time to avoid complications.

Once I set out on tours, all bills used to be collected and kept in one single envelope neatly numbered with proper dates. At the end of the travel it would become a child’s play to assemble and submit the travel bills to settle the float taken!

There was Live Stock assistant staying in front of the aunt’s house. His name was George. Though he was only a Live Stock assistant he used to be called Doctor by the village folks as he used to attend to the needs of cattle and pets during spare time. He had two daughters and as they were of our age we could pass time playing with them board games as well as cards! I still recall a visit by Dr. George to a pet owner’s house whose German Sheppard dog had eaten chemicals placed for fly control in their home. Dr.George had antidote ready with him and on giving the necessary IV injection the dog recovered instantly. The whole family was so thankful to Dr. George! I could see for the first time way of doing Artificial insemination in cows and buffaloes. This came handy when I moved to learn Dairy Technology.  

By the end of vacation, Aunt would take us to a local clothe shop in the town Poolawadi and get us clothes to stitch dresses. We used to get a pair of shirts and trousers. We were aware that aunt was taking the materials on credit and would pay installments to settle the bills. It was indeed so very kind of her do such a shopping as the same helped our dad immensely during school reopening.

Aunt was to retire soon when we entered college. Our visits became infrequent as we moved to higher classes. We used to write to her often. But she would not reply as we knew she was always hard pressed for time and busy with her work schedule.

Then all of a sudden we came to know of a sudden twist in her life. As I was in college hostel, I came to know though my dad of the same. Aunt was preparing for her retirement. One day she was visited by a couple from nearby town Karur. They were bank managers in nationalized banks. After calling on Aunt for the first time they stated that they were descendents of Aunt’s husband side. They had come to know of the existence of Aunt and about her short lived marriage to their relative. As the household then had already two widows, as per the then living conditions they could not keep Aunt in their house. As she was married into their family they were supposed to take care of her. The Patriarch of the house hold had dictated them to trace her back and do the needful to Aunt’s on her retirement.

Aunt was skeptical and immediately contacted my father and uncle. There was a hurriedly called for family meeting. It was then suggested that Aunt would visit the family in Karur and find out their living condition, life style, family values etc. Then she was free to decide whatever she wanted. After a few visits Aunt had found out that the couple’s intentions were genuine and they wanted to do real service to Aunt. She moved with them after retirement. My dad used to visit her on and off. He was happy that Aunt was comfortable and leading a decent life.

Dad used to insist that Aunt should become more spiritual. As someone who had lived all her life time in her own terms she never turned religious or spiritual. But true to her birth star’s prediction she ruled her world! She passed away peacefully after three years of retirement!

One simple secret…Aunt was in fact elder to my dad by at the least four to five years. But those days there was no system of recording births and deaths. She had given a false record in the office during initial employment. On account of that, though her official retirement age was 58 she served beyond 63 years and retired!! So she never wanted to live as a burden to anyone at any point of time!!

SUNDARI ATHHAI ( TAMIL) ….SUNDARI AUNTY (ENGLISH)….SUNDARI BHUA ( HINDI) !!!

The word “ATHHAI” in Tamil language means aunt. Aunt who is sister of one’s father! Unlike English where every- one is an aunt here the relationship is too unique and revered very much! The relationship of an Aunt and Uncle..”Uncle” meaning brother of one’s mother are held in very high esteem! Any good or bad event in one’s life the ceremonies are incomplete without the presence of these two relations! This is more so in South Indian culture!

My father was the youngest among his siblings. He had seven elder sisters and an elder brother. Due to the demise of my paternal grandmother during my father’s birth, he was nurtured by his sisters and he was therefore very fond of them. Unfortunately, when we were born, amongst the seven aunts we were to have only three remained.

Sundari Athhai was the youngest of the aunts from my paternal side. She was short by any standard and she was hardly 5 feet 3 inches in height. Very fair in complexion and she had inherited the typical money purse of my paternal grandfather. It is another matter I had hardly seen him alive but whatever I could see in some photographs I can say the same with confidence! Sundari Athhai used to wear a white blouse always. She would not put typical vermilion mark on her forehead as she was widow. She used to apply oil liberally on her hair and comb the same into a nice and tight bun! She used to wear simple cotton sarees nicely starched and ironed.

Legend says that Sundari Athhai was born in the birth star of “Bharani” and as per Hindu astrology people born in that star would rule the world! True to that my aunt was literally ruling her own world with ease and to the admiration of all and sundry!

Sundari Athhai was married to someone for hardly a few weeks.  Before her marriage would get consummated this gentle man died of Cholera outbreak in Coimbatore District of Tamil Nadu in late forties. My grandfather on hearing the news of the death of the Son-in-law fell down with a sudden heart attack and never recovered. Sundari Athhai had no one to take care of her in her widowhood as her brothers were younger to her and she had no parents to support her.

In those days, when a lady that too from conservative Brahmin household would never venture out to work she took a bold decision to work that too in government service. She became a sewing teacher and started working in rural development department in their extension wing. Thus my aunt ruled the entire Udumalpet district of Tamil Nadu. The area was predominantly dominated by Gownder and Naicker community people. Among them she was so very popular. I and my younger brother started visiting her in mid seventies. By then Aunt was in her late forties and became a Grama Sevikha! She was supposed to travel from village to village teaching rural women things like personal hygiene, nutrition, sanitation etc. Being an emancipated and empowered personality these things came naturally to her. She had given up her tailoring classes to her juniors!

When we landed up in a small village by name Gudimangalam in Udamalpet district, where Aunt was based then, we were welcomed by the entire village. As a Brahmin Widow, aunt would never eat anything from anywhere. Therefore the entire village brought fruits, vegetables, ground nuts, milk, curd and ghee to fill her house so that she could feed her nephews. We were thrilled to see the affection showered on her by all the village folks. She would proudly take us to one house after another as if we were some deservedly won trophies by her. Where ever we went we were received with abundant love and give nice goodies to eat and enjoy. In one house we saw truck loads of pumpkin being stacked in a corner. We had never seen such a sight and we described to our aunt that probably they were the richest folk in the whole village! Our aunt was amused!!

We used to be fed with lot of love by her. She was not used to cooking big elaborate meals by her as she was always staying alone. Therefore the food used to sometime too bland, sometime too spicy but the affection of her was always too much so we would enjoy the dishes with great love in her company.

She had a very small portion for her to stay. The flooring was made of mud, with a small lower level room used as a kitchen. The same were sufficient for a single individual. A small bath room was there to be used by her. We were made to go to some pump sets to take bath in the fields. We looked forward to the same as the same was great fun! There was no toilet and so it was free for all in the village set up!!

                                                                                                                                …………………….. To be concluded..

    

TAKE IT EASY POLICY

It is not uncommon to find boys and girls who come to work in a factory get a little more affectionate and after sometime the affection turns into love! From then on one’s imagination needs to gallop and go forward without a pause to understand the complications and implications!

In Thailand the affection and admiration start right from the bus stand as people embark on the task of searching jobs. Mostly people from “Pak Issan” that is North Eastern region of Thailand migrate to Bangkok in search of jobs. By and large girls lead the pack as their number is more. Boys are generally followers and follow their leaders- girls meekly.

Girls, when they meet possible companion in the bus stand strike a conversation, convince the other person, arrange for sharing accommodation and move in. Being an industry driven economy (apart from tourism) jobs are plenty and they find suitable jobs in no time. Now after moving in and having started living together then the trouble starts not for the couple in love- for the bosses who manage them!

We need to accommodate them in the same shifts, in the same department and same section so that the boy doesn't do the wandering trick and girl does not become a looser in the end. To control that, the girls become clever and keep the boy’s ATM card in their custody! Thus, when the boy goes out even to play foot ball our madam is there to escort him till the end of the game and bring him back in sober condition so that he doesn't end up with one or two bottles of beer too many !

This culture is not only with workers, it is with even staff of supervisors and levels above them too! At times even Managers too are caught in the tight web of love and have problems with “Gig”.. the other women! But Thai society doesn’t look at single, unwed mothers or fathers in good light. So when things start showing up in the tummy of the girl a marriage is solemnized quickly and whole thing is made official. As this gives economic freedom due to optimization of resources people are happy to embrace this concept of living together till it lasts!

Now, we come to Anne and Unni. Unni is not a Malayalam name. It is the name of a Malagasy worker and the story is about him and his Malagasy girl friend Anne!

Malagasy society is more French than French people themselves. Here to become a mother one need not be married. Hearsay is that girls live with boy friend for a considerable period of time and once she convinces him in the bed and then by getting him a child then they think about marriage! Parents know that their children are sexually active and are playing or fooling or enjoying around but turn a blind eye! Unwed pregnant girls go to church and do all sundry household chores without anyone raising an eye brow as all is well as long as the girl and the boy are happy.

The other day one girl was found eating food within the packing section. As the same is against companies S.O.P( being a food manufacturing company we pack food on line) the recourse taken by the girl was that she being pregnant she was entitled to eat in time anywhere! When asked to produce proof of pregnancy and marriage etc. I was warned by the HR person that the same was an intrusion into her personal life and we would get the wrath of powers in labor department! I am sure that in another nine months the girl would never go to labor ward as she is not pregnant in the first place and it was a poly to escape disciplinary action!

Anne one day met me in the packing hall! She wanted to ask something in Malagasy and I could understand little, after taking help from fellow workers she put her thoughts across. She wanted to know whether Unni would return to work. She also told that she was pregnant with his kid and two months into the family way.

Then, I remembered having caught Unni inside the compressor room of the factory smoking the other day. As it was a weekend he was sent to HR with a security escort to take needful action. His papers were made by HR Manager and Unni was to be terminated along with his accomplice who had gone to sound the alarm on my entry into the compressor and utility area the other day.

Unni was typically as the name implies, in Malayalam language- a short person with the agility of some of the great dancers like Michel Jackson or Prabhu Deva. He could mimic anyone under the Sun with ease. His Moon Walking mimicking of Michel Jackson or taking a pot shot at the Quality Manger’s style of walking was legendary. He had his knack of winning his supervisor’s confidence and got his way through minting money in overtime and running around for small errands keeping the supervisor’s happy. I too liked him as he was a go-getter. But too much of pampering had spoiled him. Therefore despite warning he was becoming a delinquent over the last few months.

Anne joined a few months back. Though not a beauty by any standard she had slightly fairer complexion probably due to mixed breeding, she had hair atypical of African style..coiled coiled type, her features were yet to mature and develop.. especially her breasts. But she had a knack of dressing well with the abundantly available second hand clothes in Madagascar. Her height was a bit less and this suited our Unni as he was also around 5 feet 3 inches only. In Madagascar there is a unique culture when a local girl passes by another Malagasi person passes comments, whistles or makes a typical exclamation sound etc. These things are taken as a normal behavior by the girl, boy as well as society. This is applicable to all and sundry irrespective of the position, status in society etc.

 When Anne joined in our company Unni was of the habit of wooing her with his cat calls etc. Thus slowly they started meeting each other when leaving work. This extended to dining together during lunch break and culminated in the bed, leaving Anne pregnant with Unni’s baby.

Now, I had the unenviable task of telling Anne that Unni would never return to work as he would be terminated from the service with immediate effect. I had seen Anne along with her mother going to Church on Sundays during my morning walks. I was too happy for her when Unni became her friend, boy friend and later constant companion. But now as Unni got terminated by my string disciplinary action I had no words to express my dismay. When the news of Unni was broken to Anne she took it in her stride and said job or no job Unni would remain my child’s father. May be after sometime I may get another working boy friend and partner!!

Typical Take it easy policy!!!

AN ODE TO MY DAD

AN ODE TO MY DAD……6

After repeated pep talk and motivation he reconciled to the fact that the changes were irreversible and started becoming normal slowly. But he never regained his gait, free movements of hands and most of the time was lying down on the cot. Whenever we called him he responded with a “ mmm”. His speech was almost gone. Whenever he tried to speak we took extra interest and started listening to him very attentively to understand what he wanted to convey.

In such a situation I had to leave with family for Malawi. He was aware of that before the operation and bid us good bye coming up to the main gate on 1^st May’1995. When my mother was crying he consoled her and asked her to see off us cheerfully. We returned from Malawi in 1999.

Slowly he was sinking and sinking in front of everyone’s eyes. But all of us were helpless. A water bed was arranged to prevent any bed sore formation. The room was air-conditioned so that he did not feel any perspiration in humid Chennai climate.

We take small things for granted. Winking of eyes is an important function. This lubricates eyes, averts accumulation of dirt and infection. As father had almost lost his left side function, left eye had lost winking ability. Therefore the eye was stitched to avert infection. Cleaning of nostril was impossible for him. So every time he was bathed special care to be taken to clean both the nostrils. Feeding after sometime was becoming a night mare. A man so fond of good delicious food survived on nasal tube feeding through which liquid food was sent through syringes.

Every time during our visit I took interest in bathing him, giving a haircut, shave and body massage with cocoa butter. These things he enjoyed greatly. All the daughters in law of the house, brothers, everyone-including neighbors helped in lifting him and taking him to toilet etc.

We celebrated Diwali of 1999 with great enthusiasm. Father was dressed in new clothes and snaps were taken. He was also looking cheerful. I was of the hope that he would reach new millennium. But by the first week of Nov. "99 he was finding it difficult to breath. On 11^th Nov’1999 he passed away in sleep. There was no screaming or any such disturbance. We were with him till 4.45 AM. My youngest brother had to go to Kancheepuram and he was seen of by 5 AM. I took a small nap from 5 to 6 AM and when I went to see Dad all fluid from his body were out and he had gone to his eternal sleep ! He was 72 years old by then.

My father’s end was like that of Bheeshma in Mahabharat who was awaiting the dawn of Uttrayan lying on the bed of arrows. He endured the pain for less than ten days. In my father’s case it was for nearly five long years.

What I learnt from my father’s life is :-

1.       Honesty is the best policy.

2.       Pretension doesn’t take anyone for long in life so be what you are.

3.       No man is an island. We all need one another in good as well as in bad times.

4.       There is nothing more important in one’s life than one’s family.

 

AN ODE TO MY DAD.....5

AN ODE TO MY DAD…..5

One thing my father never liked was taking medicines. He always believed that one must give more to the grocer than to the Pharmacist. He always used to look down on people who used complain about health issues. Throughout his active life he lived with that principle.  He was also fond of his total independence. He used to say that he would life his life in his own terms and condition. He would say that he would avoid the dependence on anyone.

But God the almighty, had a different, rather very different plans for him, we might as well call that a cruel plan. But who can challenge his wishes! Dad started slowly falling on and off at different locations. It may inside the house, in the street corner etc. This started since 1992-93. We could not leave him to go anywhere alone. He started repeatedly complaining that his health was not at its best. The same was very unusual for a man of his nature. Since he had some hearing impairment for a long time we thought that the same might be due to vertigo and used to advise him to watch his steps and not to get up from sleep abruptly.

But as things started going in a roller coaster ride down the hill we took him to a neurosurgeon. After a scan it was diagnosed that he had a tumor in the brain. On consolations the doctor said that the same had to be operated at the earliest and sent for biopsy.  Accordingly in 1995 he was taken for surgery in Chennai. The doctor assured him a minimum life expectancy of additional four to five years. Dad was not told about the operation and he was told that due to accumulation of some fluids the doctors are trying to drain the same out using a stent etc. That was more or less the preliminary stage of the operation.

Those days, I used to work with Cadburys in the sales function in Chennai. I used to stay with him in the hospital after my days work. I used to be dead tired after morning work and more or less doze off early. He wanted to talk to me all the time in the night as he was free all through the days. He used to complain that I was visiting him in the hospital only to catch up some sleep!!

His head was shaved and scrubbed. He was ready for moving into the operation theatre. By then he was becoming suspicious of the procedure. But we reassured him and moved him into the operation theatre stating that the procedure was to drain accumulated fluid in the head which was causing him to trip and fall repeatedly. The operation was successful. He was slowly recovering from the procedure. The tumor sent for biopsy was looking like a floret of cauliflower. It turned out to be benign to the relief of all of us. When we were in the hospital we could see the suffering and nightmare of many small children, adults with budding children whose future was bleak and uncertain. We thanked God that he was so kind and benevolent to our family.

After the operation my father looked as if he had a slight stroke. He lost more or less his left side movements. His face had a depression in the left hand side. His speech was not coherent and slurred. But he was fully conscious of all that was going around and anxious to get home back as soon as he could. He was discharged after a week. On returning home he first wanted to have his bath. With help the same was done. Then as per our regular practice he wanted to apply his regular tilak on his fore head. By then a mirror was passed to him and on seeing his face he was totally taken a back and become inconsolable.  ………… To be continued…..

AN ODE TO MY DAD .....4

AN ODE TO MY DAD…..4

In 1984 my father asked me, whether I was interested in getting married. By then my second brother was in the Indian Navy. Third brother had just finished graduation and started working. Fourth brother was in the final year of his graduation. I had met an old couple in Guntur who were related to a common friend of mine in 1983. When we called on them, he asked me and my friend whether we were married. We told him that though we had started our career two years back, we never thought about starting a family after getting married. He then called his wife of nearly forty odd years and introduced her as his best friend, philosopher and guide. He said that a man’s perspective of life changes so very much after marriage for the better, if one gets a “good partner”!

This chance encounter had lasting impact in my mind. Plus, when I was in college while doing “Earn While you learn “ programme in the library, I had devoured lot of books of Reader’s Digest on family, home economics, parenting etc. Therefore, when my father asked about marriage, I whole heartedly said that I was ready.

My parents, as per then custom in our community started looking for a suitable alliance. I had moved to Britannia, Chennai branch in Jan’1985.  In Feb’85 my parents had come to Chennai to look for a match. I was very clear that I would not go hopping from one house to the other looking for girls, eating sweets, snacks & drinking coffee and then rejecting the match for some vague reason or the other. So my mandate to my parents was that they must do the initial screening and discussion. I would come just for the sake of the girl to meet me and to give final OK.

My parents therefore without prior notice landed a day in advance to meet Jayashree and family on a Saturday. After having stayed in Thirunelveli district for a long time, we had also become like Thirunelveli people, clever. Jayashree’s parents were surprised at the sudden visit. After the initial meeting my father alone came to meet me in Korattur where I was staying then. My mother had been to my uncle’s house for overnight stay. My father had unassailable faith in astrology. Therefore, he was keen that I must say OK after seeing Jayashree.  That night he was so much engrossed in describing Jayashree’s virtues and beauty. He said she was looking like “Meenalochani” and this and that. I still thank him fervently for having chosen such a good companion for me, who has always proved to be pillar of strength in everything I do!

So on 13^th Feb’1985 after seeing Jayashree for the first time in her home and meeting her for a few minutes, keeping my Dad’s recommendation in mind I agreed to be her life partner!! Our marriage got solemnized in a grand manner on 22^nd May’1985. I had a week of holidays to set up the house, host a tea party in my father’s workplace (by then he was in Mettur Dam) and return to work!

After retirement in 1986, my parents moved to Chennai to stay with us. My father had told me that he would never ever work again. Thus his main interest was only carrying out daily ritual of Poojas and reading news paper. “The Hindu” had a great impact in him. The moment the paper arrived he would start reading the same and after “a glance” as he used to say, the paper used to be passed on to others. The Hindu was sufficient for him to induce sleep at anytime of the day / night. After a few minutes of viewing the paper he would simply doze off.

My father had great interest in my career. At anytime, as soon as I returned from work I must sit with him and narrate the entire day’s event to him in detail. Same way after returning from any interview or meeting I must report to him in total all that had taken place there. When I shifted to Madurai, then to Kanpur, Hyderabad and then Talegaon he was there with us to set up the family. Only after ensuring that the family was safe even in my absence, when I went to office he would leave the town. 

Birth of Sangeetha our daughter was a very interesting occasion for him. The same happened after celebrating his 60^th Birthday in a grand manner in Chennai. We took care to ensure that all religious ceremonies were performed to his fullest satisfaction. Sangeetha was on 29^th Dec’1986. That evening, I was in Indian Statistical Institute attending to my Diploma Course. After four sons in our family, Sangeetha was the first daughter, so my parents were all the more happy!

Whenever my father visited us in Kanpur, he enjoyed visiting the Ganges to perform rituals associated with no moon day (Ammavasya). He used to wash all his clothes, dry the dothi on the banks of the river. Then typically tie in it Pachakacha style. Once when he was doing the pooja on the banks of Ganges in Kanpur a group of local Sanyasis who were there, came and approached him. After offering their pranams they invited him to smoke charas. My father was shocked and we hastily returned home! Whenever he went on walks in Lal Bungalow area of Kanpur there were dozens of people to touch his feet and seek his blessings as he always had typical tilak on his big forehead!!

During 1989 we visited Banares, Allahabad and Gaya along with my parents, Uncle and Aunt as well as a widowed Bhuva to offer our prayers in every holy place. Apart from that my parents visited Badrinath, Rishikesh, Kedarnath and Naimisaranyam. 

                                                                                …………………. To be continued …

AN ODE TO MY DAD ..... 3

AN ODE TO MY DAD…..3

When we were in The Nilgiris we were naïve. We did not know how to talk in double meaning or twisted sentences. What we felt we spoke. Live in Kallidaikurichi was very different. Each and every person used to outsmart the other. In terms of academics, sports and extracurricular activities etc. everyone was smart and with very high level of competitive spirit. The river Tambhrabarani in Thirunelveli district was the nurturer of talent all the way. Thus both Saivaism and Vaishnavism thrived in the banks of the river. We used to say that the natural smartness and enterprising spirit of the people of the district was due to the unique nature of water from that river.

 As Cauvery is to Trichirapalli and Tanjavur district Tambhrabarani is for Thirunelveli district. On arriving in Kalliadaikurichi we saw in front of our own eyes role of wealth, keen interest for art and culture exhibited by wealthy people, their life style first hand. Same manner we also learnt that in an over grown village like Kallidaikurichi there was no secret, each and everyone was keener on what was getting cooked in other’s house, what was going on with others in their lives etc.

So we boys became worldly wise over a period of time. My father had his office in Ambasamudram a neighboring village and he used to walk everyday four KM one way to attend office and return in the evening. Later he was shifted to camp site and started staying in Servalar Camp which was 25 KM away from our base at Kallidaikurichi. I vividly recall the day when my mom bid him good bye when he moved to Servalar with tears in her eyes as they had never lived away from each other. He used to come weekends to spend time with us in Kallidaikurichi. He used to cook his food and live a forced bachelor’s life.

My father was deep in love with Tambrabharani River. Later when he moved to Servalar camp he was so fond of Servalar River (Tributary of Tambhabharani) everyday he used to go there take bath, finish his morning prayers and then return.

   

Dad was not a great film buff. But any good film he used to encourage all of us to see. Thus as a family we had seen films like Thiruvarutchellwar, Deivam, Bharathavilas, Shankarabranam (Night Show in Trichi and later travelled to Dindigul!) and lastly Puthumaipen. He also acted in a few dramas as Inspector etc. in the recreation club events.

In 1974 my parents took a tour to Nava Thirupathi (sacred places of Vaishnavism in Thirunelveli district) on Vaikunta Ekadasi fasting the whole day!

In 1976 my younger brother moved to Regional College of Education, Manasagangothri, Mysore. His visit every semester break was a great event for the whole family!  He was also a great entertainer as he used to narrate about every one of his friends in detail. Once my father had to make a trip to Mysore to pay his semester exam fees as the Demand Draft sent by him got misplaced during postal transit!

I moved to Karnal in 1978. My father’s letters used to be a source of motivation and my mother’s letters used to bring all news from far and wide. I came home after a year in 1979. My father used to plot the entire journey map and keep telling everyone that the train would have reached this place and that place. Alas there was a flood that time due to cyclone in Andhra Pradesh and my father was totally lost till I reached home safely!

After my course when I moved to take up an assignment in Guntur my parents came to spend some days with me. Later when I moved to Britannia he was very happy. In the meanwhile my father wanted to build his dream home in Trichi and started construction work there. Due to his poor interpersonal skills in managing electrician and carpenter etc. he had to abandon the work and leave. The problem was these skilled personnel used to come to work in drunken state and my father could not tolerate the same. I had to move in and complete the work. Despite my father being in electricity board we had to perform house warming ceremony of ANUGRAHA without electricity! My father was not in favor of seeking any concession or favors from people in authority there!

                                                                                                                …………….. To be continued